There’s a saying that we are the average of the 5 people around us, so we must be careful who do we allow to be as our friends. I also agree with this, but in the first place we must also ask ourselves - how did they come to our lives in the first place? Now this question is an interesting one because if we see one of the Law of the Universe, Law of Attraction, it is partly us that attract these people to come into our lives as well in the first place. So if I have to answer the question - it is both we choose our friends, but they also chose us because we attract them in the first place. I really believe it is always a 2-way-street.
So if you like your friends, you can of course keep them. But if you don’t, you also have the choice and the power to change that. We have free will to choose what happens in our lives, that the universe even will not interfere with it. That’s how big of a power we have.
If you want to change the people around you:
You can always say no and say goodbye to them. For example, resign from work, move house, leave a country, etc. It is your choice and there is no right or wrong. Always follow what you feel is right for you. What is right for you may not work for others, and vice versa. So do what feel is right and what works for you. When you do things with strong will and determination and it feels right to do it, even when other people cannot see it, most of the time, it will work for you.
You change yourself with your mind, energy or body subsequently your emotions/feelings. When you change yourself, slowly people around you that doesn’t resonate with you in energy will just fade away, like suddenly you realise “Oh.. they are gone from my life” Because you don’t attract them anymore.
Now, if you want to go deeper to why these people were attracted to you in the first place? For example, there are people in my life that just don’t reply to my messages, they come in and out in my life whenever they want to. At the beginning I was like, damn.. ok, out of my life peeps. But they pop up here and there, I started to question this pattern. Am I attracting this? One day, Louise L. Hay’s audiobook I can do this - popped up on my youtube video recommendation. I was like, what is this? So I started listening to the first 10 mins, and I’m like holy moly! I got the answer. So she said - when you have these people in your life, mostly is how you treat yourself or how your relationship is with yourself. I realised yes! damn, I do that to myself. Now, Louise Hay did say - I don’t say this so that you can feel guilty or you blame yourself and feel bad. There is no need to criticise yourself or judge yourself, that is a waste of energy. She said it something like that. But, to empower yourself that you can make a change to this - if you can create it, you can get out of it. And the thing that we must do first, is to be willing to change. To change our thoughts, our perspective, way of thinking, our mind so our feelings will change, so our energies will also change, and that energy will radiate out which will change our attraction to people around us.
It is not an easy, one night flip switch that will happen in one day. however, it will be a worthwhile effort that rewards you greatly when it is fruitful.
The willing to change is to change the way we treat ourselves and Love Ourselves as we are, accept ourselves as we are. Louise Hay says it best - We are all victims of victims. We learn things from our parents, teachers at school, media, religious leaders etc. that also learned from their parents, teachers, community leaders etc. that also learned from their parents…you get my point - That were not taught or did not know any information about loving themselves either, because most probably they were busy because of the world war and surviving!
So 1st:Be willing to change. 2nd : Love ourselves. How do we love ourselves your mind may wonder? She has also a 10 step love ourselves youtube video you can check out and listen to it. (search: Louise Hay - How to love yourself. It is about an hour video)
It is an amazing video, I learned so much from it. I hope you will also start the journey of loving yourself again.